Jokes

[Federberg]

 

[tented]

View attachment 6145

I wouldn’t be able to sleep until another home improvement was finished.

 

[britbox]

 

[tented]

My friend told me he had the body of a Greek god. I had to explain to him that Buddha is not Greek.

 

[tented]

Teacher: "What is the chemical formula for water?"
Student: "HIJKLMNO."
Teacher: "What are you talking about?"
Student: "Yesterday you said it's H to O!"

 

[tented]

A boy with a monkey on his shoulder was walking down the road when he passed a policeman who said, "Now, now young lad, I think you had better take that monkey the zoo." The next day, the boy was walking down the road with the monkey on his shoulder again, when he passed the same policeman. The policeman said, "Hey there, I thought I told you to take that money to the zoo!" The boy answered, "I did! Today I'm taking him to the cinema."

 

[Federberg]

 

[Federberg]

 

[tented]

At the doctor's office, Tom was getting a check up. "I have good news and bad news," says the doctor. "The good news is you have 24 hours left to live." Tom replies, "That's the good news?!" Then the doctor says, "The bad news is I should have told you that yesterday."

 

[tented]

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth?
A: A brick.

 

[tented]

A woman is at a grocery store. She goes to the clerk to purchase her groceries. The clerk looks at her items and sees a carton of eggs, a gallon of milk, and a head of lettuce. He says to the woman, "You must be single." The woman was surprised & replies, "Yes, how did you know?" The clerk answers, "Because you're ugly."

 

[Federberg]

 

[Federberg]

 

[Federberg]

 

[Federberg]

 

[Federberg]

 

[the AntiPusher]

What does Greg Norman and I Dream of Jeannie character "Jeannie" have in common?

They both blew their Masters!!! jajajaja

 

[Federberg]

 

[tented]

 

[tented]